


Santa's Visit

by Alisanne



Series: Adventdrabbles 2014 [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 11:06:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2730134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alisanne/pseuds/Alisanne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p><b>A/N:</b> Written for Adventdrabbles' apparently very controversial prompt #6. <a href="http://smg.photobucket.com/user/1Alisanne1/media/Christmas-hangover_zpscd45722d.jpeg.html">Holiday hangover/Drunk Santa</a>, and as an anniversary gift for the lovely Cordeliadelayne, who is celebrating her 10th LJ-versary today.  She requested Snape/Lupin, "by the fireside". I hope this suits, sweetie! </p>
<p><b>Betas:</b> Sevfan and Emynn. </p>
<p><b>Disclaimer:</b> The characters contained herein are not mine. No money is being made from this fiction, which is presented for entertainment purposes only.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Santa's Visit

**Author's Note:**

> **A/N:** Written for Adventdrabbles' apparently very controversial prompt #6. [Holiday hangover/Drunk Santa](http://smg.photobucket.com/user/1Alisanne1/media/Christmas-hangover_zpscd45722d.jpeg.html), and as an anniversary gift for the lovely Cordeliadelayne, who is celebrating her 10th LJ-versary today. She requested Snape/Lupin, "by the fireside". I hope this suits, sweetie! 
> 
> **Betas:** Sevfan and Emynn. 
> 
> **Disclaimer:** The characters contained herein are not mine. No money is being made from this fiction, which is presented for entertainment purposes only.

~

Santa’s Visit

~

“--and I don’t know where he is.” Andromeda looked distraught. “He was supposed to be here an hour ago.” She lowered her voice. “Teddy’s distraught.” 

“This is what happens when you hire Mundungus Fletcher to play Santa Claus and you pay him ahead of time.” Severus rolled his eyes. “What were you thinking?” 

Andromeda sighed. “I know, I know. He just...seemed so sincere. He even showed up in the Santa suit when he asked for the job.” 

“He probably was sincere in his desire to drink your money away,” Severus muttered.

“We’ll go look for him,” said Remus. “Maybe he got...distracted.”

“Oh, would you?” Andromeda smiled, clearly relieved. “Thank you. I just don’t know where else we could get someone to play Santa Claus at such short notice.” 

Severus raised an eyebrow as Andromeda walked away. “ _We_?” 

Remus sighed. “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to.” 

Severus rolled his eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous,” he said. “The places Dung frequents, you’d probably get lost if you went without me.” 

Remus smiled. “Right. Let’s go.” 

Dung wasn’t anywhere in Diagon Alley or even in Knockturn. After an exhaustive search, they gave up, starting towards Andromeda’s house. “I don’t know where he could have gone,” said Remus. 

Severus rolled his eyes. “A man like Dung is probably sleeping it off somewhere.” His eyes narrowed. ‘Wait. I’ve an idea.” Pulling out his wand, he did a quick Point Me Spell, which directed them towards a dark, tiny alley a few streets away. 

“What could he be doing in here?” Remus muttered. 

“Nothing good,” snorted Severus as they entered. 

After only a few steps they spotted him. 

“Typical,” said Severus. 

Remus sighed.

Dung, wearing a fake white beard and moustache, was sprawled against the alley wall. He had somehow ditched the majority of his Santa suit, with the exception of his Santa hat, which was perched strategically over his privates. He was also obviously inebriated, an empty bottle of beer held loosely in one hand as he snored loudly. 

Severus shook his head. “What was Andromeda thinking?” he said. “Of all the people to hire to play Santa--” 

“Yes,” Remus agreed. “He wouldn’t be my choice.” He groaned. “The bigger problem is, what do we tell Andromeda and, more importantly, Teddy? He’s expecting Santa Claus.” 

Severus smirked. “I don’t see why we can’t use the resources we’ve been given,” he said. With his wand he Summoned Dung’s fake facial hair and Santa hat, leaving him utterly naked. Dung didn’t even stir. Holding up the hair and the hat, Severus wrinkled his nose. “Perhaps you should thoroughly Scourgify these first before wearing them.” 

“Me?” Remus coughed. “You do realise _you_ have to be Santa, right?” 

“What? Why?” Severus scowled.

“Because I’m Teddy’s father and he’ll expect me to be there when Santa comes.” 

Severus groaned. 

Remus grinned. “So, Santa, how long will it take you to get ready?” 

Severus sighed. “You are going to owe me for this.” 

“Of course.” Remus smiled slyly. “If we do this, Andromeda will be more than willing to keep Teddy for the weekend. So how about a fireside massage later?” He hummed. “Just you, me, a fire, and the massage oil.” Leaning in, he caught the lobe of Severus’ ear with his teeth, and whispered, “Oh, and maybe some wine.” 

Severus shivered. Clearing his throat he waved his wand, transforming his clothes into a creditable Santa suit. “What are we waiting for?” he said, voice slightly hoarse. Turning on his heel, he dragged Remus out of the alley. “Let’s go. Santa has a little boy to visit.” 

~


End file.
